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Marriages are more than just relationships: they are contracts that entitle the individuals in the couple to certain assets that may exist completely outside of the personal relationship. As a rule, spouses work together to support one another to promote growth in all areas including family size and financial matters.
Most often the changes that impact a couple fall within normal life developments: (more…)
Most adults have heard of a prenuptial agreement. Regardless of a person’s personal interest in a signing a prenuptial agreement, most recognize that the idea of clarifying issues before a couple weds makes sense. We tend to see a marriage as a clear marker of separate versus joint – and in most circumstances this is a positive change in perception as it helps cement relationships and lessen the chance of divorce. (more…)
Mothers know and love their children like no one else. Seldom do they plan to raise their kids with the involvement of a stepmother, however for many this becomes a reality: a reality that can trigger a host of uncomfortable feelings and situations for mothers, stepmothers, fathers, and children.
It can be difficult to have a relationship with an ex-husband’s new partner: your child’s stepmother. This is even more difficult when the new woman was the catalyst for the divorce or split. However, when there are kids involved, (more…)
Distance and circumstance can affect how separated and divorced parents spend time with their children – regardless of the nature of the relationship between parents. Sometimes parents are separated or divorced; sometimes away on business or military deployment; sometimes the multi-household arrangement is by design.
Often a focus of discussion is how parents, who live away from their children, maintain a positive parent-child relationship – especially when parents are divorced or otherwise separate due to relationship issues. (more…)
One of mediation’s most praised qualities is the fact that it is an incredibly cost-effective option in contrast with traditional litigation. Although cost may not be a pressing concern for high net-worth individuals, mediation offers many attractive features that make it the ideal route for high net-worth divorces.
Likely the most salient concern high net-worth couples may hold is their privacy. When litigating, your marriage goes public. As there are a large amount of assets at stake, you and your spouse’s history is all evidence and will become public record. In extreme cases, this can become an embarrassing public circus. Conversely, the mediation model avoids the spectacle of a divorce trial, allowing all parties to work out the details behind the scenes and obtain a civilized divorce.
Additionally, divorce can be bad for business. Oftentimes, high net-worth individuals reached that position through business ownership. If the business is publicly traded, it may cause apprehension among investors if they see a pending divorce that includes business assets as part of the anticipated decree on the prospectus. Choosing to mediate offers the parties options to manage this sort of outcome. Sitting down with a neutral mediator can facilitate a dialogue between the parties and can help craft an agreement that is in the best interest of both spouses and causes the least long-term damage and embarrassment.
While these concerns may especially affect high-net worth individuals, there is no reason why every single person considering divorce cannot benefit by the features that divorce mediation has to offer. We all hold our privacy near-and-dear to our hearts and utilizing private mediation can keep our private affairs just that. In the big picture, mediation is the natural way to resolve disputes. Through the assistance of the neutral mediator, working together with the other side, and having substantial input on the ultimate solution the parties come to give individuals a feeling of satisfaction with the outcome of the mediation. Unlike in litigation where parties are ultimately “told” what to do, in mediation, they “decide” what to do – the control is all yours. People with high net-worth, to people with few-to-no assets can all benefit from mediating, rather than litigating, their divorce.
Discussions about prenuptial agreements tend to stir passionate responses from both sides. One side talking about protecting assets in the event of a split, and the other side experiencing a prenuptial as an indication about a person’s true feelings raising concerns about trust commitment.
Regardless of the perspective a person has regarding a prenuptial – the vast majorities of people do not get married with a desire or plan to end the marriage through divorce. Unfortunately, despite the intentions at the time of engagement, many marriages do end in divorce.
In a divorce, the extraction of lives entwined as a couple is much more difficult and emotional than just dividing up a few things. The emotion about the breakup bleeds into the division of assets and future individual financial issues. This is further complicated if there are business partnerships or other outside financial relationships.
A prenuptial agreement allows a couple to plan the split (which they never hope to have) at a time when they are feeling the most positive toward one another. The perspective each partner has prior to marriage is far different than at the time of divorce. A prenuptial is a contract of sorts that provides a framework for for future decision making and one that hopefully will never need to be implemented.
Why Mediate a Prenuptial Agreement
Mediation is a particularly good means of negotiating prenuptial agreements, as mediation is designed to build on agreement and positivism in communication as opposed to reinforcing or creating conflict. Traditional legal intervention is one of opposing sides: it is an adversarial process.
Negotiating a prenuptial agreement is not a fun process, who wants to think of splitting up when you are planning to be together? Mediating the prenuptial agreement is the most efficient and least adversarial means to complete the task, freeing the couple to focus on building their future together.
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Additional Reading:
The divorce news of Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren provide many examples of the benefits of divorce mediation.
It may be hard to believe, but less than eight months ago the first signs of marital discord between Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren became public. Now it appears that the terms of the divorce are nearly final….significantly less than a year later.
In many ways this case mirrors cases that are resolved through divorce mediation:
Divorce is seldom the desired outcome of a marriage – but it does not need to be a tragedy. Nor does the divorce process need to compound the emotional issues and stress related to the split.
Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren did not enter into their relationship with divorce as the desired outcome, and certainly the speculation and attention paid to every detail of their actions and plans does not make this easier.
Regardless as a couple and parents, at least in appearance, they exemplify a dignified and reasonable couple going through a divorce: an option for all couples who choose the peaceful positive approach of a mediated resolution.
