http://www.facebook.com/pages/CFR-Mediation/271140287576Briefly veering off the path of obvious mediation topics….
Today a sad story of senseless violent death and an individual’s apparent struggle with mental illness was brought to an end. Maurice Clemmons, a long-time consumer of our criminal justice system, was shot and killed by Washington police ending a multi-day manhunt. Clemons is considered the individual responsible for killing 4 uniformed police officers as they sat in a local coffee shop catching up on their paperwork on November 29th.
The story, understandably, has captured the attention of the national media. Like the other recent tales of workplace violence, all eyes are on the suspect: Everyone looking for a person or a thing to blame. This story is truly one of tragedy: for the officers and their families and the witnesses of the shooting; and likely a longer story of tragedy for Clemons and his family.
Living with mental illness is often a frightening persistent struggle against pervasive fears. Mental illness – whether a psychotic disorder like schizophrenia, a mood disorder like bipolar, or anxiety disorder like PTSD – is often full of fearsome thoughts, images, and physiological reactions that are very real to the person experiencing them. Living with a person with a mental illness means having to respond and relate to a person who struggles in and responds to a reality so different and internal.
Although clearly not a story of conflict resolution, this is a story about fear. Media coverage and blogs have seized the details of the story and the apparent psychosis experienced by Clemmons, and laid them out in an effort to explain everything – to give answers – to respond to and play on our fears of random violence.
Fear is such a powerful tool. Listening to the news, it is hard not to see how fear steers decisions: The 2008 presidential election, the 2009 health care debate, the response to “global warming” as opposed to the less frightening but more accurate “climate change”, or even holiday shopping trends in the current economic climate.
Everybody, in some way or another, responds to “fear”. Not just the obvious fear responses like the natural startle response or “fight or flight” adrenaline fueled reaction, but also subtle psychological fear reactions.
How many people involved in a conflicted relationship avoid addressing the issue for fear of what will happen? How many in conflict jump to an attorney and forgo mediating their own resolution for fear that they will be taken advantage of? How many will not try divorce mediation for fear that they will not “get the best deal”?
The fear response is not inherently bad – and can keep us safe. However, how often does fear blind us to the possibilities in life? By locking ourselves behind the veil of fear, we often assume a far costlier position.
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Tags: cops, divorce, fear, maurice clemmons, Mediation, seattle, shooting
