http://www.facebook.com/pages/CFR-Mediation/271140287576
So often when a couple has made the decision to divorce – their best intentions and desires seem to get co-opted by well-meaning and concerned friends and family. In an effort to be supportive or protective advice, solicited and unsolicited, seems to come from every direction.
Advice can be be helpful: a divorce is something typically not planned for nor do most know how to go about it. In addition, the break-up of any relationship is a conflict and like any conflict or dispute, family and friends respond based on their own frames of reference – which includes their personal fears and biases.
Friends and family members, although not directly involved, are not objective about the divorce. By the very nature of their relationship with those divorcing, friends and family members have a vested interest in the outcome. Perhaps family are concerned about how the dissolution will impact their continued relationship with the couples’ children. Perhaps friends are angry at how their friend was treated in the relationship. Perhaps friends or family worry about the long-term financial outcome of the break-up. Perhaps friends or family members have their own related baggage and hope to save others from learning the same lessons.
Regardless of the advice, all imply that there is a specific way that a divorcing couple is supposed to go about settling the terms of the break-up and ongoing parenting.
However, every relationship and every divorce is unique. Which means the only people that really know what is going to work best for them are the couple going through the process. In other words, there is no one settlement or parenting arrangement that is best for every couple.
Divorcing couples can, and should, look for support and input from their friends and family. In the end, however, friends and families have to trust that those divorcing are making the best decisions for them. They are the experts in how to end their relationship and how to structure their post-divorce lives.
___________________________
Additional Reading:
- How Long Does Divorce Mediation Take?
- Role Of Emotions In Conflict
- Wanting To Hurt
- Often Pride Increases Conflict
- Think Of the Children – The Importance Of Child Custody Agreements
- Is Divorce Bad For Your Health?
- The Problem With Litigation
- Why Couples Divorcing Should Try Mediation First
Related Posts:
Tags: advice, conflict of laws, coupling, divorce, divorce in the united states, divorce involving children, Divorce Mediation, divorce mediation florida, divorce mediation florida custody, Divorce Mediator, divorced couples, divorcing, family, Family Law, florida divorce mediation, get, how is it, how to divorce, human interest, law, law and divorce around the world, mediating divorce, Mediation, mediation florida divorce, mediator, ongoing, own divorce, parenting plans, pennsylvania divorce court involving children, reading, relationship, settles, social issues, suppose, texas divorce, to be
