Archive for the ‘Parenting’ Category

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Why Divorcing Couples Should Try Mediation First

Saturday, April 9th, 2011

Couple ArguingMost divorcing couples find that they are in a period of high conflict.  Some have experienced constant arguments and fights for months or years; some are reacting to a sudden change of heart.

Regardless of the circumstances and presentation, conflict between divorcing partners exists and is often seemingly impossible to navigate.  Most often impending divorce results in a traditional type of intervention: retaining attorneys and asking them to resolve the issues, however divorce mediation is a better option for the vast majority of couples and families. (more…)

Parental Divorce & The Longevity Project

Thursday, April 7th, 2011

Buy The BookWe seem to love rules and directions. Self-help is a billion dollar industry. It seems that everyone is looking for an expert to tell them how to live “right”. We trust others to be the experts in knowing what is best for us and our children, even when they have no direct knowledge of us.

This is true in regards to divorce, marital relationships, and parenting as well. There is a new book, The Longevity Project, that reports “parental divorce during childhood was the single strongest social predictor of early death, many years into the future”. In many ways this provocative statement is being used as newest rule to live and parent by. (more…)

Mediation – Divorcing When Children Involved

Sunday, March 20th, 2011

Parenting Child CustodyFor many, divorce mediation seems an impossibility for couples that are not getting along. It is as if only those couples who are getting along or in apparent agreement about issues – despite their decision to divorce – can realistically consider mediating their split.

Many think that divorce involving complex emotions and reactions cannot be mediated. As if the hurt and anger means that the couple cannot determine what is best for them and their family. This is a myth. (more…)

Child Custody Agreements – Modification

Thursday, March 10th, 2011

Parenting MediationIn a divorce, how do parents best respond to the needs of their children? In the best-case scenario, a comprehensive parenting plan or child custody agreement was completed at the time of the divorce. The parenting plan is an agreement that provides a clear framework for parents and families to operate under and make joint parenting decisions as children age and new circumstances develop.

Unfortunately, many parents find that their parenting plans or child custody agreements are limited in long-term effectiveness and application. Often original child custody agreements are created in the litigation process. Attorneys created the plans, (more…)

High Conflict Situations – Can Mediation Work?

Monday, March 7th, 2011

Couple ArguingEveryone, at some point, ends up in a conflict with someone else. And, despite what it may seem like at the time, no one likes being personally involved in a heated dispute with another person or entity: if the outcome did not matter the conflict could not really exist as it would no longer be “fed” by the disputants.

Conflicts come in all shapes and sizes – and some are extremely heated. Those in dispute may not be able to look at one another without feeling experiencing anger and hurt. Although it may not seem that there is always an option, choosing how to respond to the dispute can have a significant affect on the outcome. (more…)

Mothers & Stepmothers: Making Relationships Work

Friday, March 4th, 2011

Mother/StepMotherMothers know and love their children like no one else. Seldom do they plan to raise their kids with the involvement of a stepmother, however for many this becomes a reality: a reality that can trigger a host of uncomfortable feelings and situations for mothers, stepmothers, fathers, and children.

It can be difficult to have a relationship with an ex-husband’s new partner: your child’s stepmother. This is even more difficult when the new woman was the catalyst for the divorce or split. However, when there are kids involved, (more…)

High School Principal Charged With Child Abuse

Wednesday, February 16th, 2011

A Florida high school principal, Darren Jones, was arrested for disciplining his 16 year old daughter.  Jones admits to beating his “out-of-control” daughter with an electrical cord on her arms, back, legs, and hands. 

His daughter has since been removed from the home. (more…)

Why Use a Divorce Mediator

Sunday, January 30th, 2011

Divorce MediationDivorce is a difficult process. Regardless of the reason behind the break-up, the process of formalizing the divorce is often upsetting both emotionally and logistically. The logistical process of the relationship separation can trigger and aggravate the emotional issues involved. In cases where at least one person identifies a triggering event for the break-up of the relationship, the emotions involved can make a peaceful efficient resolution of the issues almost impossible without involvement of divorce professionals. (more…)

Divorce – How Is It SUPPOSED To Be Done?

Tuesday, January 11th, 2011

Divorce MediationSo often when a couple has made the decision to divorce – their best intentions and desires seem to get co-opted by well-meaning and concerned friends and family. In an effort to be supportive or protective advice, solicited and unsolicited, seems to come from every direction.

Advice can be be helpful: a divorce is something typically not planned for nor do most know how to go about it. In addition, the break-up of any relationship is a conflict and like any conflict or dispute, family and friends respond based on their own frames of reference – which includes their personal fears and biases. (more…)

New Years Resolution: Conflictual Relationships

Monday, January 3rd, 2011

thinking-womanIt is hard to believe that it is 2011 already. As usual for many a new year means New Years Resolutions – a vow to do things differently.

Resolutions may be a promise to exercise, stop smoking, eat healthy, recycle more, or actively work to change a perpetual life circumstance. Whatever the resolution, for the person it is ultimately a promise to oneself to make a positive life change. Perhaps a resolution that should be made more often by individuals and organizations is to change the approach to conflict. Specifically, individuals and organizations can resolve to give a renewed focus on resolving conflict-fraught relationships. (more…)

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